He wonders what it would be like to feel them against his own lips. She glances again in his direction. He focuses on his phone, suddenly deciding he's had enough Explosions in the Sky for tonight. After searching for a couple of minutes, he settles on something more laid-back: Pavement with their lo-fi ramshackle grooves. Malkmus is doing his stoned-country thing. It suits his present mood just fine, and makes him feel like everything's alright. His head begins to nod in time with music.. ’ He was baiting her, and she knew it. He had never had trouble with math, but he wasn’t a genius either. She couldn’t help but scoff. ‘Simple? Calculus is simple?’ ‘Eh. Maybe it’s you that’s simple.’ His eyes shone with mischief, letting her know just how happy he was to piss her off. But he also knew that her intelligence was a sore spot. She cursed the heat that flooded her cheeks, refusing to look away. His eyebrows quirked and he gave her his crooked grin. He knew exactly how to get to. I'll just have enough time to catchthe next bus." I quickly dressed, grabbed my coat and tore out the door,yelling, "I'll see you at dinner tonight." Dinner was a good 6 hours away,and, if I was guessing correctly, that would give them ample time to dowhatever they wanted. I ran down to the corner and disappeared from sight.My route, however, was different. I went up the hill to the next block,cut over a railroad bridge, and backtracked to our yard through some fieldsand an orchard. The orchard. He was dead, war, Iraq, IED, at 23. Afterwards I found the stuff he had written on his computer he left behind at home. Fantasies of sex with me, his mother.I read of his deep love, his wish to demonstrate it physically to me. His words spoke of a respect for me that had kept his desire secret unto death. But it didn't follow him to the grave. It lived on in his lurid writings on the hard-drive and in the driving lust it sparked in my loins for my son's hard-on. Now that he was gone, it seemed.
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